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([ia4f5102]Boston Globe[/ia4f5102]) - The Panthers' 2005 season opened on a strange note a day after the rookie draft ended with a surprise announcement from owner Dewey Cheetham.
"I've hired a GM for the team, bought an island in the South Pacific and don't plan on returning to Boston" was the surprise announcement from Cheetham as he spoke through a speakerphone at the team's press conference whilst on his personal jet.
Cheetham went on: "Frankly, the draft was a big headache. I spend all this time researching and everything and then [ia4f5102]my kid[/ia4f5102] comes up with better picks using his computer. Give me a break. Early this morning when it finally finished I went out to the porch and here's this squirrel, just talkin' to me. He says 'Just think, all this time you spent trying to improve a team that went 8-8 the past two seasons, when you could be spending time on a private island in the South Pacific.' The squirrel had a point. No matter what I do this team goes 8-8. They're not bad enough to get us high draft picks, and they've not been good enough to keep anyone interested. You try being the only person in a luxury box when the other 40 are sitting vacant! So I've hired this GM-guy flere-imsaho, bought the island, and that's it. Good luck. See ya."
And with that the line went dead... and immediately started ringing again. A nervous-looking man next to the speakerphone gingerly pressed the talk button and billionaire Cheetham continued "Oh, and one more thing. The guy who probably just picked up the phone is the new VP in charge of Owner Affairs. He's the only one with my number. Now where did I put that..." and the line went dead a second and final time.
The new VP of Owner Affairs quickly introduced himself as I.M. Hareid and confirmed the details of Dewey Cheetham's speech. "We will be having another press conference this afternoon at 3:00 to introduce the new GM and answer further questions" Hareid concluded, and quickly scurried from the room.
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