With a fan base confused about what to call their struggling CFL franchise, it's clear that the Massacre is most fitting as new General Manager/Assistant Kickholding Coach Cotton Wayne Kidd has come to Beantown with a blank check and a stack of pink slips to distribute.

It may also be fitting in how the team has performed up until an unlikely 27-3 welcoming present win over the division rival Tigers for their new GM. "We're the ones getting killed. The name is becoming a popular joke around New England, and I'm going to make sure that our franchise has the last laugh," said Kidd, "I've got disgruntled players. I've got a bunch of rusty subs rotting away on their benches. Attendance is tanking. And morale and leadership is at crisis levels."

Asked if his arrival had anything to do with their upset victory over Brooklyn, Kidd was blunt, "No. Although, I do think the players can smell that stack of freshly printed pink slips in the corner office. It's going to take much more than that to turn around this franchise. In fact, it might get worse before it gets better. But I can promise the deserving fans of New England that they will have a CFL franchise to be proud of by the time I'm done here in Boston."

Kidd admits that he barely knows most of the players at the moment, and with playoff hopes all but mathematically dashed, will consider the rest of the season an "audition" for a new-look Boston team in '23.

As far as the name controversy, Kidd is taking a new approach. "We're going to be polling our fan base in the days ahead to come up with a new name for this franchise as it sheds its old, crusty losing skin for a stronger, more viable one." When asked if there were any early leading candidates for the new name, Kidd replied, "Yes. But we're going to have to consult our new marketing staff to come up with the name nominations rather than asking our fan base, because if the fan-based voting ended today, the CFL franchise here would be called the Boston Turds."

"Yeah, I know. Tough crowd. Ask the Red Sox."

nice read.

The Yankee fan that I am approves the 'Boston Turds'...

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Former Detroit Vampire owner

Great Lakes division champions -2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023, 2025
Eastern Conference champions - 2005, 2006, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023
CFL Champions - 2021, 2023

FWIW, Boston has also been the Panthers before.

I really need to work on my league history subject...

_________________
Former Detroit Vampire owner

Great Lakes division champions -2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023, 2025
Eastern Conference champions - 2005, 2006, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023
CFL Champions - 2021, 2023

BTW, I'm not going to change the name in mid-season. What I'm probably going to do is come up with three or four candidates and have you folks vote on it, if you want.

I may even do up prototype logos.

[quote2d14f7e="Cotton"]BTW, I'm not going to change the name in mid-season. What I'm probably going to do is come up with three or four candidates and [u2d14f7e][b2d14f7e]have you folks vote on it[/b2d14f7e][/u2d14f7e], if you want.

I may even do up prototype logos.[/quote2d14f7e]

Oh no he didn't... (a lesson in being careful what you wish for)

I think Boston Tea Party would be a fitting short-term solution as there is soon to be a revolution. Then again, changing the name back to Massacre shortly thereafter would make it full circle but this has been discussed already.

I've cranked up the Turftoe name generator to see what falls out, so here we go...

Boston Baked Beans or just Boston Beaners (cuz he who smelt it dealt it)

Boston Mutts (Shawmut Penninsula reference)

Boston Brahmins (you may have to look it up to understand the irony)

Boston Fire (because nothing says a waste of tens of millions of dollars like the words "Boston Fire")

Boston Globes (this could be one helluva team logo - we should all have a pair of globes on our helmets)

I think New England [i2d14f7e]whatevers[/i2d14f7e] is another viable option as nothing completes a rename like a complete rename. Ditch the Boston jinx and go with New England. It's one of the few cities with a good alternative name.

After not being thrilled with the initial results, I had to enter more detailed analytics into the TNG-2K4 (TurfToe Name Generator, 2004 edition - we all know all software of the 2004 variety is superior). It identified the antagonist of each of the division rivals - Tigers = Hunter; Phantoms = Parapsychologist/Ghost Hunter; Attack = Defense. So, a new list was derived focusing on the hunting aspect..

Boston Stalkers
Boston Trappers (involves a stretch reference to Trapper from MASH who was from Boston)
Boston Beaglers which begets Boston Bloodthirsty Beagles (insert FFF League History reminder here)
Boston Scouts
Boston Safari (definitely ties in with hunting Tigers and other big game or trophy hunting - yet other double entendres)

Again, New England can be used in place of Boston. Or better yet, Massachesetts (sp? I'm sure I butchered it - ooh, Boston Butchers might work) can be used. There's nothing like hearing sportscasters blurting out Massachusetts several times during a telecast. Mass. Murderers would work well for a Massachusetts name. Or...

Mass. Chaos
Mass. Turbators (I believe that's a turbine production company in the New England area)
Mass. Production
Mass. Confusion
Mass. Basters (for our dyslexic fishing friends)
Mass. Minimalists
Mass. Mess (another short-term name, hopefully corrected long-term)

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ROF Division Champions: 2039 - 2043, 2045, 2047, 2054, 2056 - 2060, 2063, 2066-2067, 2070-2072
WFC Conference Champions: 2018, 2041, 2042, 2057-2058, 2060, 2062-2063
CFL Champions: 2018, 2041, 2057-2058, 2060, 2062

TT = clutch.

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Ring of Fire Division Champions - 2009, 2011-2026, 2028-33
Western Conference Champions - 2011-2013, 2016, 2017, 2019-2022, 2024, 2025, 2028, 2033
CFL Champions - 2011, 2013, 2016, 2017, 2019, 2020, 2022, 2025